2014.05.14 - Healing Men and Monsters

This was getting embarrassing. Still, it as good to know a person you could depend on -- even if it meant that you were pumped full of your emergency painkillers and semifunctional at best. He had sent on a text and a GPS coordinate to a less than great place to be in the Amusement Mile, specified a rather large sum as available payment, and waited for Rain to arrive.

The Joker had, despite his wounds, been zip-tied at ankle and wrist, trussed up like a hog for slaughter. To say the least, this has not gone how Jason had intended. All he could think was: So damn stupid, so very very stupid! He kept the Joker alive by treating his shock and keeping him carefully laid out on the busted up bench on the Merry Go Round that had, once upon a time, seen better days. Jason himself fit that description; he was exhausted, sitting in his battered body armor with his red helmet sitting on his motorcycle jacket and his small arsenal collected along with his webbing, but wearing none of it.

He just hoped she got here soon. Joker mnight not be long for the world, and Jason felt like death warmed up.

Rain practices a sort of universal compassion. After all, not everyone is sparkles, honor and light. But sometimes ... she really has to wonder. She seems less interested in the payment and more concerned. Really, she used to work for sandwiches and shower rights. Rain's still getting used to this whole income business. Nevertheless, she will make her way over quickly. Broomstick transport is great that way. But why not teleport? Last time she ended up in England in drag. She's not that great at it, that's why. Portals seem to be fine, but teleporting is right out.

She peers at the cheap GPS she keeps on her phone (hey, she DOES work as an occult detective most of the time). And there's the place. "Hello?" She will carefully knock on something nearby. Best not to startle someone injured.

"Over here. I'd get up, but..." He'd been punched by a freight train, and the day before there'd been a fierce fight with the goons that belonged to whoever replaced Angel Marin as Bludhaven's new Big Boss. Jay looked up at her -- domino mask still on (barely), hair a frighten and....well, not moving. He's the most vulnerable he's ever been in years and not simply because he's injured.

Oh geez. Rain frowns, seeing his state. Poor guy. He might be incredibly violent for all she knows, but it's still sad seeing someone in this way. "Don't worry. I won't tell anyone and I don't bite," She murmurs. "It's okay. I'll come over there. Um." Who is that he has hogtied? Rain sort of blinks. Her eyes widen. They are indeed, a dark purple. She furrows her brows. "Him first?" She asks quietly. This is raising a flag so big and red that she has no flag big enough OR red enough. It would possibly be seen from space. Nevertheless, Rain is the sort of neutral who tries to be compassionate even in the face of 'oh dear gods and godesses'.

"No," Jason was quick to say. He glanced at the bloodied up clown, but only just. He was a meat, no more. A means to the end he was trying to reach. "He's... He needs to be healed to the point he can be safey transported. No more. And I need to be able to keep between him and you if he still feels lively once he's feeling better." He coughed out a rough laugh. "Plus I haven't blindfolded him yet. You don't want him to see your face."

"Okay," Rain nods. She looks to Jason. She seems concerned. Her eyebrows lift. "... I - okay." This is bad. She's never really had such a controversial patient. And a certain person's words echo worryingly in her memory. She'd rather not lose a friend. But on the other hand... Well. This one, she'll just have to keep quiet. It's likely life threatening, and she'd rather not cheese off Batman or anyone else by letting people die. It's sort of a witchy version of the Hippocratic Oath. Do no harm, even through neglect.

"I'll take your word for it. You can hum a motivational Journey song while I work on you if you like, then," She remarks quietly. With that, Rain falls silent to begin her work. It takes at least a few minutes of Rain looking like she's ascended into zen or something you'd find hawked in a relaxation spa.

Jason's eyes close; he's been here before, and the slow surcease of his pain is bliss. His one arm flexes as bones mend, and his body slowly relaxes. He rolls his shoulders, grunting as his bones pop.

Rising, he straightens up -- tugging at his armor, making sure that his armor was mostly intact. The divot between his shoulder blades dug in, but it was survivable.

"I've searched him," he said, once Rain was back with the living, "and I should have everything he could smuggle on his body, but I wouldn't put it past him to sweat Smilex at this point." He tugged out a simple, black hood and carefully put it on the unconscious clown, and cinched it tight around his throat. "There we go. When he wakes up -- don't speak. Don't give him ANYTHING he might use to find you."

If this went south-- he absolutely refused to have Rain's blood on his hands.

"...You shouldn't put anything past me, dear boy." states the clown on the bench, as the Red Hood is preparing the cover. Slowly, one swollen eye opens. Focusing directly on Rain before it's tugged over his head. "...Mmm. You don't hit NEARLY as hard as Batsy... who's this girl with the EXOTIC eyes? Is she going to be part of the fun?" The voice would be instantly recognized. The Joker. One of the most dangerous, lethal men to ever walk the earth.

He coughs heavily, obviously indicating some amount of damage. And then he manages a pained giggle. "Ohhh... and why did YOU look so fit as a fiddle, Mr. Hood... Is she a HEALER?" He doubles over, laughing. Rain can confirm he's going to die if not attended, but from his manic actions aggravating things, he's probably going to be able to go full throttle through what should be incapacitating pain. "Heehee... you'd... you'd heal a MONSTER like me, girl...? Ohhh... I'll sing your PRAISES to the HEAVENS, then!! Batman will thank you..."

And then, in a much darker voice, "But I'm not sure what the /rest/ of the world will think..."

"I'm a neutral party. Your business is yours. But yes, I am a healer. Do no harm, even through neglect. If you are a bad person, that is on your time. Do be aware I can turn you into a newt if I want though. You'd get better... They always do. But um, thanks." Pause. "Truthfully, I'd rather you say nothing of me." She's contemplating curses. Good ones. She always practices safe hex. She's thinking ... maybe duck noises or dog barking if he tries to out her. "Seriously." She holds up her hands. Either way, time to set to work.

For now, no curses. Even if she contemplates a silence curse. Ahem. Nevertheless, she isn't going to come out of this well. The mental weight of it is obvious, hanging on her shoulders and head. Time to set to work. "Are you feeling better?" She asks Jason. And then, time to sorta mend Joker. Enough to keep him well, but not so much he'll do handstands. No one wants handstands. It takes time though, and she falls quiet.

"Shut your fucking mouth, clown!" Rain is so polite. Jason, of course, is not. He gives the Joker a rattle, snarling barely restrained. He's healthy and hale now, and more than ready to put the clown on the slightest provocation. It takes everything not to.

"Don't talk to him," he said, and rattled the Joker as his wounds mended... partially. He grumbled, and fumbled with a tranq dart from his belt. "Take a nap, you piece of filth."

Goddamn it. That was exactly what he was trying to avoid.

"Hoohoohoo!! Ohhh... this is RICH!" comes his muffled voice from the bag. "Do you know what you are doing, girl...?" he states, in a twisted voice. Healing him... Rain could feel the taint. Like she was repairing damaged cancer. His entire body is warped, wrong, damaged. Genetics and brain mangled to such a point it bonded with his soul, and her sorcery cannot repair it. The true damage, beyond the wounds, is literally part of him now.

"I was wondering how he'd keep me alive... but I saw it in your eyes. You aren't evil, are you? No... so why on earth are you HELPING me? I didn't see a GUN to your head... hahahahaha!! Good!! This is your first step DOWN the exhilarating path! I'll murder a bus of CHILDREN for you. When you read the headline, know it's ALL FOR YOU!! A THANK YOU!! The guilt... the guilt will start driving you MAD! I recommend /embracing it./"

Rain sighs. She stares at the clown. Rain pauses. She ponders this a moment. "Hey. Look. I'm not going to start hurting anyone, self-defense aside," She holds her hands up. "You're hardly the first to try to torture me." Freaking ultramasochistic soul reaving chimeras trying to assimilate her. Muttergrumble. But then, it dawns on her. She tilts her head. "Your actions are your own. Removing you would cause a serious dent in the Gotham ecosystem, all that jazz." Not to mention Batman would be kinda pissed and the Red Hood is RIGHT THERE.

But it's time. Time to go full Clockwork Orange. "Do no harm, even through neglect. A doctor's not responsible for the patients he heals. Furthermore, most of you tend to die within a few decades." A beat. But Rain has a contingency. She just smiles serenely and - she's casting something.

"....what are you doing?"

THE RED HOOD IS RIGHT THERE. And he's suddenly very anxious. And an anxious man with a pile of guns is dangerous. Good thing he sticks as solidly to his own code as Batman does to his.

"Say whatever keeps you SANE at night, sweetheart... for as long as THAT lasts..." He feels the surge within him, laughing muffled all the while. Rain's made quite a mistake. What is 'barely functional' for most people... well. That's 'too healthy' for what Todd wanted. Unseen behind his back, his thumbs silently dislocate, twisting free of the plastic straps. "Hahahaha... Hrrk... Brk... Hrrghle...!!" Suddenly he sounds like a cat with a hairball, convulsing. Is he choking to death? Shouldn't be possible, with Rain healing him.

And then his arms flash free. The Red Hood is close -- close enough to catch him. But not before he rips off the black fabric. "PTOOEY." A small yellow orb with a smiley face whirls out, covered in saliva and the remnants of his meal. It's aimed right at Rain; and the moment it impacts the ground, it bursts into a cloud of purple gas. "S,Sorry, got something in my THROAT!!"

"Sanity is relative," She lives a life like someone on mushrooms. And she still flinches around anything with tentacles. Never again. Rain tries not to think about nearly being crushed and cut up by those awful razors. She does not like all of her patients. "A simple contingency," She offers to Jason. But then, he's twisting free and choking and - holy crap! Rain is going to bolt faster than stoners at free Doritos.

"Son of a BITCH!"

With Rain moving like grease through a goose, Jason has unenviable project of 'beating Joker up, twice, in one day.' Yet he goes after the clown with near fervor, gauntleted fists swinging hard and fast. The Joker may come to regret tripping Jay's hair-trigger temper-- since he's going to attempt to break his face -- and after, his thumbs. Let's see you try and move out of cuffs or ties with broken fingers....!

"You need to leave," he tells Rain without preamble. "I'll make sure you get paid. But for now you need to go," and Jason needed to load up the Joker for a delivery.