2014.01.03 - Flash In The Pan

In the distance of the New York's harbor, the sound of a large boat's horn can be heard echoing the area. A common sound indeed. But when one zooms closer to the scene, a less likely sound can be heard resounding through the warehouses and docking boardwalks of the area: the shrieks and wails of a dozen or so grown men holding handguns. Sometimes you have to expect the unexpected in New York, but these particular men did not expect a gang of fifty or so rodents--squirrels to be specific--to descend upon them with intent to... well, bite. Crawling up pant legs, clawing up shirts, moving too rapidly to easily grab, the men were quickly rendered pathetic and bleeding, some of them falling to the ground.

Under some cover, Doreen Green stood watching the scene, more determined than giddy, that her plan had worked. Her squirrely friends had reported to her last week that this group had been polluting the area, but she'd suspected it a worse threat. Indeed, these men had been unloading pallets full of illegal weapons onto the dock. She prepared to make her entrance and finish the job!

The Flash arrives on the scene after being alerted by the watchtower. Wally is taken a back by what he is witnessing. "It's like a cute version of Willard. I had read the squirrels are getting meaner, but this is ridiculous."

Not noticing The Flash, Doreen emerged as soon as she felt the men were sufficiently distracted. She made a swooshing leap into the middle of the assembled gangsters. In her mind, her sudden appearance would send the gangsters into a terrified frenzy, easy for a final knockdown. Then she'd dial-up the police. This whole superhero thing was really working out, she thought.

Unfortunately, these particular fellows, while taken off guard by the animal assault, did not seem even slightly panicked by Doreen's arrival. In fact, one particularly large, tough dude managed to raise is handgun, a fully loaded .357 Magnum, and point it at Doreen, squeezing the trigger despite the nine or ten squirrels tearing into the flesh of his torso and legs. Doreen's Squirrel-agility kicked in, and she cartwheeled a good six feet away, dodging the initial shot. But he fired a few more times.

The Flash squee'd to himself after seeing the adorably-dressed, new hero, and then got to work in the quantum-fraction of a second. He ran in front of the bullets fired and sapped them of their speed; they fell harmlessly to the ground. He moved at a blinding speed to disarm the thugs.

"Next time, you gotta disarm *before* you make an entrance. Or else you and your bushy-tailed crew could get seriously hurt," Wally suggests, after moving the guns well out of reach.

Doreen's eyes lit up with the unexpected arrival. She knew exactly who this was, and she almost stuttered. Addressing the men, most of which were lying on the ground at this point: "Give up and I'll call off the squirrels!" she shouted. Eyeing the large gangster who'd taken shot of her, she knew how lucky she was to have such ridiculously keen reflexes. She blinked and the men were suddenly disarmed, presumably by The Flash. Yes. She winced, however, as a rapidly-moving bulge rose from the gunman's shoe to his crotch, he squealed like a little girl, presumably being horribly bitten.

"Aw nuts," Doreen declared. She knew that her #1 friend, Tippy-Toe, had come to her defense in an unnecessarily vicious manner. That was a squirrel you could count on. Doreen pushed her arms to her sides, shouting, "Okay, guys. You can stop now." Immediately, the little creatures perked their heads up, gazing at Doreen, and seconds later launched-off every which way, disappearing quickly. "Thank you all so much!" she yelled out to them as they left.

The arrival of The Flash had completely caught Doreen off-guard, and she'd forgotten about the calling-the-police part. Her whole body turned towards him, and she slowly stepped closer, her cheeks flush. "Omigosh! Haaaaai!!" she said, not able to contain her excitement.

Wally watched all this go on still a bit of confused. But when this squirrel-like girl greets him with such excitement, he responds with his own excited brand of friendliness. "Hey... so, who are you? Adorable outfit, by the way. Did you train all these squirrels yourself?"

This was the first time Doreen had ever been in person with a honest to goodness, famous superhero, and her hands shook nervously. Her mind went blank, and she just stood there a good five seconds, staring at him. She tried her best to shake off her nervousness, however, not wanting to embarrass herself. "I..." she started, awkwardly, "I'm Squirrel Girl! Thank you, thank you for saving me!" she announced.

At Doreen's feet, one particular squirrel sat there, looking up. It's shiny, pink bow glimmering slightly in the sun. The little guy jumped onto her back and climbed up to her shoulder to get a better look at The Flash, it's head turning slightly. Doreen continued: "I'm such a big fan!" Addressing his next question, Doreen asserted with a strange proudness, "Squirrels are smarter than ya think. But I do have a way with them." She smiled at him in another moment of silent awkwardness.

"Well, hello, Squirrel Girl. I'm The Flash," Wally offers a handshake. "You've got a surprisingly formidable force here. Plus, being cute and fluffy makes them unassuming." Wally takes a moment to greet the squirrel on her shoulder: "Helping your friend do hero stuff, are you?"

Tippy-Toe the squirrel's beady little eyes studied the flash, and made a little chirpy sound. Doreen had thought about a moment like this many, many times. Sure, it usually had someone more like Tony Stark. Or Superman. Or Spiderman. Or Batman. But she was still happy about this, and didn't want to ruin it. She stepped in closer, trying to engage The Flash in a conversation, "So, what's it like?" she started, "Ya know. Being in The Justice League. The best of the best. Is it crazy?" she wondered aloud. It was almost as if she hadn't just been dodging gunshots. Was she... flirting?

Wally smiled and put his hand on the back of his head. "Well, uhm, I never really thought about it. I'm a bad person to ask, actually.  It's normal for me... I grew up around the league members, so I guess I don't really register how special it is. They're just my friends and family, at this point," Walls says, "They're all good people." Wally then asks, "How long have you been at this?"

OMG! thought Doreen, *The Flash* is asking her about herself! She tried to stay calm. "I'm a mute--" she started, but interrupted herself, "I moved here six months ago--to New York--here," she said, her sentences getting choppy, "--I was born, I mean, I'm a mutant." She flicked up her hand, revealing sharp looking, not-so-human looking claws. Rather than perhaps an impressive display, the sharp pointing things going up near Flash's face might've seemed a bit disconcerting. "Been training to be a superhero for so many years!" she announced.

Wally smiles. "I moved to New York few months ago myself. Used to live in Kansas." Looking at the claws, Wally just reacts with an interested amazement. "Wow, so you were born like this? That must have been rough. I know how cruel some kids can be. And you've been training? On your own... or do you have a mentor?  I do help out at a part time at a school for 'gifted' kids..." Wally says. He continues to inspect Doreen, but with a calmness, to show he isn't judging, but just curious.

Doreen answers back, "Well, not exactly--I've been training on my own... but for years," she says, thinking back to the countless afterschool hours spent in the forest fighting only imaginary targets.

But upon mention of the school, she says, "I'm not so sure about those schools. Aren't they kinda snobby? A lot of mutants are just as mean as regular people," she concludes. She steps in even closer into The Flash's personal bubble, and blinks: "Will you be my mentor?" she asks earnestly.

"Well, the school is not just mutants. It's also for normal people that are gifted in more conventional ways.  And I haven't been there long, but I have seen very little bullying." Wally stops his motor mouth chatter, however, when Doreen gets into his space. Wally blinks and smiles again, "Of course I can help mentor. I'm always happy to help a new hero do the best they can."

"Okay, wow! Okay!" Doreen cheered. In her mind, she ignored all the talk about school and only one thing was repeating in her head: The Flash is talking to me! OMG! It was on an endless loop. Her eyes looked coy, and she had slipped her hand into her bag, pulling out a business card. On it were pictures of squirrels and contact information. "Would you be interested in meeting me for dinner so we can discuss this further?" she asked.

Wally can't help but let out a giggle at Doreen's infectious excitement. He takes her card looks it over. "I'd be happy to meet with you for dinner." Wally says before putting the card into the secret pocket in his costume.

Doreen jumped up and down for a moment. Tippy-Toe her companion latched itself onto her, confused. "That's so great. I have so many questions about The Justice League that you can answer!" she proclaimed.

Behind the two, several of the men (who were supposed to have been reported to the police a while ago) were dragging themselves up, blood staining the concrete in little puddles below. One of them had even gotten to his feet, and began to run. Doreen was too distracted by her interaction to even notice.

The Flash notices the dudes starting to get away. "Excuse me for a second." He disappears, followed by a red blur wrapping around then men. In seconds, they're all tied up, and The Flash is back in front of Doreen on a cellphone. "Hey O! Yeah, it's Flash. Got a handful of guys needing a pick up.  And rabies shots.  Yeah, a pack squirrel mauled them before I got here. Darnedest thing. Okay, thanks.  You stay safe, talk to you later."

Wally puts the phone away, completing his call, "So, where were we?"

"You were picking a restaurant. And I was heading to school... I have a test to take on the pack habits of Felidae and Canidae," Doreen says, almost like she's too shy to hold the conversation. She takes a pre-job stance, and smiles once more, "Call me!" she says, and runs off at a pretty good speed for a non-Flash. "Thaaaaanks again!" she calls back. A million thoughts race through Doreen's head on her run to school.

Wally smiles and laughs to himself at the Squirrel Girl's response as she runs off. "You'll be hearing from me!" He shouts back at her. "She certainly has spirit," Wally says, as he heads off.