2014.01.29 - Dromaeosaurid Theropod

SHIELD Helicarrier Argus - Bridge Level

The bridge of the Helicarrier is a hub of activity at all hours of day and night. Numerous monitoring stations line the walls and stations are set up in concentric circles around a central command center. One entire wall is made of panelled glass windows which can be covered with blast doors during battle.

From here, the ship's navigation is controlled, and missions are monitored.

"Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, watch it! That's the Night Night Gun!"

"Well, it's on my stuff and it doesn't work, and there's no way we're calling it the Night Night Gun." Jemma Simmons gathers her things, giving Leopold Fitz a disbelieving look as he hefts a rather long, slender, and sleekly designed weapon in a manner that is, well, somewhat awkward.

"The bullets work. Non-lethal, heavy stopping power, break up under the subcutaneous tissue?"

"But with a dose of only point one micros of dendrotoxin! I'm not Hermoine, I can't create instant paralysis with that."

Leopold Fitz and Jemma Simmons. Two of SHIELD's brightest and youngest scientists, have just boarded the Helicarrier, having come aboard via helicopter. The two have been bantering on and off throughout the entire trip, so consumed with their technobabble that they haven't yet realized just where, exactly, they are. As they walk through the flight deck and move toward the lift, their banter grows even more hectic.

"You should have run the specs by me--"

"The bullets are hollow! It's--"

"--before we even left San Francisco--"

"--a marvel I can keep them from breaking apart--"

"--in the first place." "--in the chamber. Because the weather--" "The lab we had there--" "--there is so nice--" "--was perfectly capable of handling the advanced--" "--I wouldn't want to keep you from the tan you--" "--testing regiments you--"

"--weren't working on." Fitz and Simmons somehow manage to finish their bantering argument with the same three words, a mere moment before a soft chime announces the lift's arrival. When the doors open to reveal a trio of ops agents, they shut up at once.

"Hullo," grumbles Fitz, while Simmons provides a bright and cheery, "Hello!"

The door to Maria Hill's office is open. Normally it is closed. And for good reason, really. Maria's pet - blame Roy Harper there - peeks out and scampers across the gap between Maria's office and one of the desk. The little critter rapidly realized where one of the agents was keeping beef jerky. And it smells, oddly enough, good.

Was it mentioned that this "pet" is in fact an accurate, slightly-feathered, velociraptor? No? Well it is!

And then just as quickly it darts back.

Maria herself is easy to see, pacing back and forth. Her headset is on and while she's not speaking, she does not seem to be terrible happy. But then again, when was the last time anyone ever saw Maria Hill in a good mood?

Enter, Tony Stark. With, as always, long suffering Pepper Potts alongside him.

Dressed impeccably as usual, he's been brought up via surface conveyance and not in the armor. Making his way through, he's giving off a very different air than that of the irreverant playboy he's portrayed as. Hands in his pants pockets as he walks alongside Pepper, speaking quietly with her as they make their way to Maria Hill's office.

Pepper Potts is likewise impeccably dressed as she walks alongside Tony, whatever their quiet discussion entailed being derailed when she turns to look at movement caught in her peripheral vision: the small, feathered shape darting back into Hill's office. Her eyes flit from the office door, toward Hill, then back to Tony.

Recently approved for the Argus, anywhere outside the brig that is, the blonde haired woman walks across the bridge in a confident stride heels barely making a sound. The pinned on name tag has the lowly number of '2' on it, could lead any one not used to seeing her here woundering how she even heard about the Helicarrier, much less rates the Bridge authorization.

'Dr. Karla Sofen, Special Consultant' is actually written on the name tag, if anyone were to be able to pull their eyes beneath the numeral in embaressment burt orange.

Eyes scan over an old fashioned flip folder, thumb releasing white page after white page as she reads. Attention shifts to the skittering claws of Watson as the Raptor makes his pilfering run at the pouch Karla left there in order to give him periodic treats. "Oh, you are going to spoil your dinner." She mutters, but any attention is stolen away first by Stark and his armcandy. A glance towards Assistant Director Hill's office. Only then does she notice the young pair on the bridge, one second later she is looking about for who then parent might be. The folder is flipped closed. "Good day." she manages as she halts her stride.

Fitz and Simmons remain oddly quiet as the lift carries them to level two. It may have something to do with those ops dudes being present, not to mention unresponsive. At one point, Fitz reaches up to scratch the back of his ear uncomfortably, while Simmons is making a terrible effort not to be distracted by zOMG MUSCLES. Of course, once the doors open, they're back at it.

"For the record, Fitz," Jemma starts, "I don't tan well."

"Well."

"I burn. You should know better, you burn too, you silly oaf."

"Wot? I'm not an oaf!"

Their feet seem to be on autopilot. They still haven't recognized just where, exactly, they are, bogged down as such with duffle bags, assorted gear, and Fitz's cherished (and not yet completed) 'Night Night Gun'. Soon enough though, the hub of activity draws their attention, and a brief reprise to the almost continuous stream of banter.

"Oy," remarks Leo.

"Where- are we lost?" asks Jemma.

"Simmons, we're on a Helicarrier!" Fitz turns to his partner gleefully. "I've never seen one up close, much less been on board!"

"Yes, but are we lost?"

"No, of course not." Leo turns to point directly at Maria Hill's office, just in time for his next phrase to be caught in his throat as he sees that thing scampering into her office. "WOT THE HELL!?" He almost drops the gun, and in his nervous shuffling of the precious thing, his duffle goes down with a loud -thud!-

Meanwhile, Simmons is nudging Fitz in the arm, nodding her head Karla's way. Of course, Fitz is too shocked at seeing that thing running into Maria's office to care, so Jemma just offers an apologetic and awkward smile. Of course, when her eyes alight on Tony and Pepper, they grow just a bit wider, and she freezes in place.

"No, he's in SHIELD custody. With all due respect, Director Alexander, he's committed plenty of crimes of that calibre outside the United States. You know how these trials go." And then Maria frowns deeply. She's straining her words, desperately trying to rein in the anger simmering in her eyes. "You... do not get to make that accusation, just because you don't like that I'm playing by the rules. By all means. Ask Director Fury." She then 'hangs up' and slams her headset to the desk.

The Deputy Director rubs the bridge of her nose, looking around. "I hate the NSA, Watson," she mutters, addressed the little dinosaur directly. "I really do." She mutters something even less polite, realizing she left the door open. Whoops. Got distracted by the call. When she steps out, the dinosaur - Watson - takes this as permission to leave as well, and promptly scurries out to make for the jerky stash. Apparently Maria hasn't noticed.

Tony Stark is almost to the Deputy Director's office when he stops where there seems to be a slight logjam of people include two that appear to be lugging most of their belongings, in addition to a really, large rifle-like gun. He looks around, unsure of what to make of the situation. He glances to Pepper, then back.

Then Tony goes "on".

"Okay," he says, feigning a sigh, "Let me guess." he looks to Maria, "This is bring your sister's kids to work day and yours had triplets, right?" he notices Watson, does a double take and his eyes go wide ever so briefly. He points to the feathered dinosaur and says, "Sorry about your cousin." then he looks to Karla, "You look like you're not as new as," he motions to Fitz and Simmons, "these two, who haven't even been shown to their quarters yet, but who are still working on their science fair entries." he eyes the gun quick, "Non-lethal rounds, right? I can tell, because your magazine isn't rated to any known calibre, which means you're either going with tranquilizer rounds or some kind of electric stun rounds unless you're thinking you're ahead of the curve with something new. In that case, call my assistant here, and make an appointment because I could use a couple of exchange students in my development lab." he then looks at Karla, "You look vaguely familar..." he squints a little bit, "You were in one of the subs on that HYDRA errand..and I think, Vegas? That was a bit of a blur, I apologize."

Tony Stark, ladies and gentlemen, he's here all week.

"... so with the R&D budget proposal on the slate for Thursay, I wanted to make sure you'd -- "

Pepper startles and looks over at the two young people when one of them drops their duffle bag, instantly pegging them as R&D types even before the clue that the unusual weapon provides. She turns back as the Deputy Director steps out of her office and Tony starts in on very likely insulting every person converging on Maria, but upon seeing the little dinosaur skitter toward someone's snacks, her expression instantly becomes stern and she snaps her fingers sharply enough to be heard very easily over the general din of the room. "Watson, no." Yes, she's scolding the little velociraptor for trying to abscond with a snack.

Then just as quickly Pepper changes expression again and offers the FitzSimmons pair then Dr. Sofen polite smiles and nods.

When Maria's 'pet' makes another appearance, Fitz draws back and holds the rifle closer to his chest, like a stuffed animal. Simmons scoffs. "Oh, relax, Fitz. It wouldn't be here if it were dangerous." She says that oh-so-convincingly. As if she was also trying to convince herself.

She also seems rather interested in the thing, watching it with a sudden burst of inquisition.

Tony all but demands Fitz's attention. "Sophisticated tranquilizer rounds," he says defensively. "Much more agreeable to aerodynamics than darts, not to mention more familiar to ops agents bloody hell, Tony Stark..?" It's almost difficult to tell just where one sentence ends and the realization of who he's speaking to kicks in, were it not for the sudden widening of the eyes somewhere between 'agents' and 'bloody'.

"Did he--" Jemma Simmons points at Tony Stark. "--just try to hire us?" She looks to Fitz. "Is that against the rules?" She looks back to Tony, smiling awkwardly. "I like to obey the rules." She turns a charming and slightly out-of-place smile toward Pepper.

"Stark Enterprises, development lab." Fitz seems lost in some kind of boyish pipedream, until the words 'exchange students' finally register, at which point he scowls and says nothing more. Instead, he pointedly looks over at Maria, and nudges Jemma right back before gesturing toward Maria with his head, giving Simmons one of those 'hey you idiot walk this way' looks.

"Deputy Director Hill?" he asks, reaching for his duffle. "I'm--"

"He's Fitz," Jemma offers helpfully.

"She's Simmons. I'm Engineering, she's..." He looks confused for a moment. "...Bio... Chem."

"We're reporting as requested, Director."

"Yeah, guess you lot need some help on the 'fun stuff' front?" He lifts the gun indicatively. "It'll work in three days, I promise."

Simmons looks doubtful about that.

Maria Hill shakes her head at Tony, offering him a hand to shake. Polite greetings. "They're..." Introductions made. That saved some time. "And that is Watson. Agent Harper thought I'd get a kick out of her, I suppose." She glances back to the scientific duo, nodding at Fitz's gun. "Do not shoot my dinosaur."

Speaking of Watson, the dinosaur stops and looks uuuuuup at Pepper. Did she understand? It seems so, for she stops digging for jerky and wobbles back to Maria's feet. If she could pout, she probably would be. "Thank you, Ms. Potts. I was wondering if someone was sneaking her food." Watson - barely bigger than a turkey, it should be noted - immediately is scooped up. Easier this way, nobody trips.

"I know. I've seen your dossiers," she reminds the two. "We've already had lab space set aside on R&D level, and quarters for you both on the barracks level." she tells them. She offers them both her hand, which means Watson gets awfully close to poor Fitz. "Welcome to the Helicarrier."

Tony Stark shakes Maria's hand, and looks at Watson, "Is..it..an agent too?" he says, smirk on his face. Okay, so maybe a little of the old Tony is peaking through. He goes back to surveying FitzSimmons, and smiles. "I didn't mean it as an insult, you know." he says to Fitz softly, "I meant, actually, as a SHIELD detachment working in my R&D. Sometimes, it's easier to get things done when you aren't worrying about.." he looks around, "donking your head on bulkheads and the like." saying something he said to a friend not too long ago, as equally as enticing, "It's candyland..you guys would love it.." he looks at Maria and grins, "C'mon..can they bunk over?"

Pepper Potts sighs. "Tony, no. You can't just borrow people like that." And she honestly kind of loathes to think what kind of budget allocation fiasco that would create. But, hoping that that's the end of it, she offers her hand to Simmons first to shake. "Hi. Sorry for..." Well, she doesn't have to actually say, does she?

Leo and Jemma look at each other and grin. Maria knows their file, and the horrid nickname 'FitzSimmons' is IN that bloody file, and she didn't use that name. This might go well! But Fitz frowns reproachfully when Maria suggests that he'd dare do such a thing as shoot Watson. He would never! Until Watson gets too close for comfort, at which point he just might be reconsidering.

Then again, that sounded like an order. Yeah, that was an order.

"Thanks." Fitz purses his lips and tries his best (read: failing) to have a polite air when he returns Maria's handshake.

Jemma, on the other hand, seems to absolutely adore Watson, though there's an almost sick fascination with the creature, as if she's entertaining the thought of a dissection. "Does he bite?" she asks, reaching a hand tentatively for Watson before drawing it away.

Tony's offer, put that way, seems to soften Fitz up quite a bit. Some of that boyish wonder comes back, and he shares a look with Simmons before looking back at Maria, eyebrows rising.

... are those puppy dog eyes?

Simmons breaks the eye contact to greet Pepper warmly. "Hello. You're Miss Potts, right?" She rightly beams. "I read dossiers, too. And the internet. Seriously, you're all over the web feeds. I don't think most Executive Assistant CEO Vice Presidents gather that much attention, but considering Mister Stark, I think it's perfectly understandable. I'm Simmons, Jemma Simmons, and this is Leopold Fitz. We're..." She looks to Fitz then, realizing her mouth was running. "When did you stop talking?" she asks Fitz.

Maria Hill looks at Tony. And then Fitz and Simmons. And then Pepper. That's where her gaze lingers. "I can't put you into someone else's hands as a new responsibility," she tells Fitz. "Mr. Stark is a busy man. ...However. If Mr. Stark is willing to allow you access to whatever he had in mind, I can see to a budget reallocation on my end. In other words: if you need something, you go to him first, if we don't have it." That's almost as good, right?

"And no, she doesn't bite," Maria tells Jemma. What /looks/ like a smile briefly appears on her lips. "She's been very good. She's a lot more intelligent than anyone suspected." Of course it's hard to guess with extinct species. Watson, in fact, seems to understand the concept of 'petting' and visibly cranes her neck to put her head under Jemma's hand. "Can you hold her?" Despite the fact that Jemma's probably got other things to deal with, Maria dumps the small dino into her arms - good thing Watson is light - and returns to her office. In a few seconds she comes back, holding two StarkTech phones. "Here. These were programmed and assigned for the two of you." It takes some dong, but she passes over the phones and retrieves her dino, too.

Tony Stark smiles. This is why he likes working with SHIELD, he gets what he wants, he makes them happy. It's a great working relationship, he raises his eyebrows and looks at the two, "Well, the Deputy Director IS right. I am busy what with the family business, Iron Man, the Avengers, and uh, accidentaly piledriving dinosaurs into the moon." he looks briefly to Hill, "Uh, yeah, Sorry about that. I made up for it the next day. Promise." he looks to Pepper with a "keep quiet" look, and then back to the two young Agents and hmms. They're getting standard StarkPhones, are they? He hmms. Pulls out his own phone, which doesn't look like a phone at all, but a thin piece of plexiglass that's pretty well see through. He holds it up and looks through it, seeing the two phones, and says "JARVIS - unlock 'em. Put me and Pepper on Speeddial." - a thin British voice comes through /somewhere/ on the device and says, "Done sir. All services and features unlocked, Priority dialing shuffled and re-prioritized. You and Miss Potts are now Numbers 1 and 2 on their instantdial service."

Tony nods. "Tell me what you two need, and I'll make it happen." he looks at Mara, "I think you'll be happy with the results." he looks to Pepper, "See? I didn't steal them after all. I can share." - he all but sticks his tongue out at her.

Pepper Potts is done greeting the pair and steps out of the way so Maria can hand them their phones as well as play musical turkey-raptor. She's only slightly surprised to hear Hill basically give the R&D kids permission to go on a playdate with Tony, and pulls a tablet-sized version of Tony's thin plexiglass 'phone' from her teal shoulder bag. She looks at Tony with her eyebrows drawn together for only a moment, then busies herself with typing something one-handed on the tablet at a pace that is simply annoying as she sends notice to the Tower security (along with images of Jemma and Leo) to have their R&D access badges created and ready. "Yes, yes, very nice, Tony." She's clearly humoring the man.

Simmons is properly distracted from Pepper by Watson, and she's positively swooning. Quickly she ditches the gear from one hand, letting Watson climb along and nestle into he arm. "Awww!" She looks up at Maria, still beaming. "She is positively adorable. If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to have a closer look at her some time. Nothing intrusive, of course! Just, well, it isn't every day you get to examine an actual dromaeosaurid theropod."

Meanwhile, Fitz is busy eyeing Jemma and Watson reproachfully, until Maria essentially grants that permission. And when Tony starts showing off his technological genius? Fitz just stares. "... Cool."

Both of the agents accept their phones. They look at each other, and even though they're not metas or whatever, it's almost as if some sort of telepathy is taking place. A beat later, and they're gathering their things.

"Well," says Fitz.

"We'd better--"

"--go and get settled in."

"Check out the lab--"

"--thoroughly."

"And I'm sure we'll be calling, Mister Stark, Miss Potts." finishes Simmons.

"Til then mates," adds Leo, before flicking off an awkward salute from his forehead. "Long Live the Commander in Chief."

Jemma gives everyone an apologetic look before rushing off after Leo. Within moments, they are bantering excitedly all the way into that lift, and then? The duo are gone.

Which of course means Maria's number is now number 3 on the list. "And Fitz? Simmons?" Clearly annunciated so that she's obviously not using the nickname. "If I'm not around, and Ms. Potts says no to something - it's no." Just to make that clear. Good timing as well, because Maria's own StarkTech phone goes off. "You're welcome to go see the lab with them," she tells Tony. "I'll have to work on the reallocation with Ms. Potts anyhow." After her call, at any rate, which she immediately takes as she steps into her office.