2015-02-15 Magnetic Madman Goes Rogue

The Imperator of Genosha threw his diplomatic immunity in the face of America by publicly vivisecting an American citizen on live television last night. Martian Manhunter of the Justice League and the mutant heroes known as the X-men saved thousands as the dictator departed, declaring war on humanity and crumbling a 20 story apartment building. (Picture of Logan standing in the rubble of a ruined section of the apartment building in a torn uniform holding an adorable Labrador retriever) According to the Chilean ambassador, "We were discussing a possible trade treaty...or why we should build a statue of the man...I honestly don't remember, honestly he was so full of himself, but then this man threw a bottle at him and said,'Go home Mutie' and then he snapped." The man, Chester Feankson, was a two time recidivist offender on probation. Magneto then casually lifted the man up and began to choke the life out of him. Martian Manhunter was immediately on the scene and tried to talk sense into the madman. (Picture of a horrified crowd looking up at a terrified human crucified to a car with Magneto extending his arm in a dramatic gesture) X-men Iceman, Wolverine, Undine and Storm arrived to try and talk sense into the dictator. Magneto ignored them, pontificating about the hypocrisy of America. "Then he just ....snapped," said Earl Washington, a hot dog vendor in the crowd. (Picture of a close up of Magneto's face of sheer hatred and taking delight in that hatred. There is a pure delight in his eyes with the subtitle saying,"Taken while executing the human", later to be called "The Executioner Imperorator" and is repeatedly used in many magazines and on cable talk shows) Several countries have already removed all diplomatic credentials for Genoshan diplomats. Sources say many personal accounts belonging to Magneto have been seized and moves are being put under way to seize Genosha's considerable sovereign wealth fund. As he left, Magneto toppled the foundation of an apartment building so he could run away. Thanks to Iceman, much of the buildings infrastructure was saved, but the damage is estimated to be in the millions. Storm saved hundreds trapped at the top and Wolverine and Undine saved many in the lower floors. Thanks to the efforts of the heroes, the only person who lost his life was the victim of Magneto's hate crime. Motion in the Senate was swift, with many demanding that Genosha be placed on the state sponsors of terrorism list, with some even asking for a formal declaration of war with Genosha. While war is not likely, anti Genosha sentiment is high and some form of legislation is likely within a day or two to reach the President's desk. While the state department has yet to issue a formal response sources range from, "I told you so!" to abject horror. Anyone previously showing sympathy towards Genosha has lost considerable clout. Surprisingly, anti mutant sentiment has largely been restricted to a drastic spike in small rural communities and the usual fringe subjects that perennially trot out the MRA every year but are, thankfully for now being ignored. Quietly, sources point directly to the efforts of the X-men as countering the worst of anti mutant sentiment. "Genosha makes it easy," a senior military official said off the record,"They are not another race but another country run by a loon, like Latveria, North Korea or Khandaq. Many counties are also demanding Genosha's expulsion from the UN. Russia has apparently reopened its emergency mutant control camps and has ICBM's on full alert, but that has not been confirmed. NATO forces are on high alert and intelligence agencies are trying to track the current location of Genosha.            The X-men, specifically Wolverine, rescued a dog named Fluffy. Fluffy is a Labrador retriever and her owner is ecstatic of her return. (Picture of a ridiculously cute little girl holding the dog while the girl smiles at Logan). The dog will be fine.                                             The Feakson family has not yet made a statement but they have confirmed the remains that it was indeed their son who was killed. "He was going to be an artist," his mother cried. "He was such a sensitive soul." (Picture of a hub cap monstrosity titled "Mutie Go Home" is shown) The UK coast guard rescued thousands dropped to their near death into the ocean by Magneto near the Falkland Islands. It is believed that Magneto purged many on the islands, their families and even their pets. At least forty bodies were recovered who died on impact in the water. Another agitator for the murderer was someone named "Kilroy" possibly Kilroy Conneticut who lead some kind of less radical faction on Genosha and may or may not be a mutant. (Picture of Kilroy's driver license photo in which his hair is in a sideways cowlick and he looks like a drunk young Wilfred Brimley)