2012-07-25 MojOlympics - Basketball

It was a normal day like any other. Well, as normal as it gets for people like these. Flowers were delivered for to Wayne Manor for Tim Drake as a get well from someone signed "S". The lovely clerk at the minimart gave Constantine a free candy bar with his smokes. For Peter Parker, Steve Rogers, Selina Kyle, and Hank McCoy, a delivery woman, with her prematurely white hair up under her FedEx hat, dropped off a small box labeled, 'Try our brand new Spiral bar!' in fancy lettering. Inside was a bar of chocolate which looked, and smelled, delicious. It had a white chocolate swirl inside a dark chocolate swirl inside a milk chocolate swirl.

The moment Tim smelled those flowers, and the others took a bite of candy, was the last moment the MojOlympians remember. The next thing they recalled was waking up somewhere /else/, wearing a restraining collar (cybernetic, psionic, or magical, as needed) they could not get off, and surrounded by burly humanoids with tusks and lots of weapons. Robin found his injuries healed. They were held in strange tubes which were transported on repulsors of some sort while being given given a video crash course in basketball, Mojo style.

Most of the rules of Earthly basketball seem to apply. There are two teams, two baskets, one ball, and the object is to get the ball into the other team's basket. That's where the resemblance ends though.

The contestants are informed that the ball will explode, violently, if they hold it too long without passing or shooting. The court itself is mined with obstacles, mechanical tentacles, caltrops, Mojoversians shooting tiny bombs at them from the sidelines. Oh, and fighting the other team is totally allowed. The court is inside a large electrified cage so while they can leap or fly, they can't get out.

Also, The competition is not exactly human. At the center court line on one side of the stands (which have viewers belted in behind transparent steel so they can't get away), is an announcer box where the anchor for MoJo TV sits -- a lovely triple-breasted alien with purple hair, and a huge smile. Dangledooper Transmada is the surviving twin of the pair with more than a pair. The indentured servant is finishing out her deceased sister's contract with Mojo, and she's been a ratings star on his network. Her cheerful voice comes over the speaker system as the tubes move to one end of the caged the court.

"Welcome back to MoJo TV's continuing coverage of the 2012 Summer MojOlympic Games! This is Dangledooper Transmada, coming to you from the Mojo Basketball Arena. Mojo has, of course, kidnapped the best and brightest of various worlds to participate, totally against their will, to suffer for the pleasure of our viewing audience!" She is required to say that every episode, it's in the contract. "So let's get back to the fun! First, let's introduce Team Mojo! First up we have Ma'gog and his son Gog! These famous furry hunters are sure to spell doom for team Terra!" A fuzzy red-furred humanoid with a white Mohawk, beard, and moustache comes out with his furrier, also mohawked red-haired son. The former is in ornate clothing, the latter just his fur. They look muscular and possibly bitey.

"Also we have everyone's favorite spelldancer, Spiral! I'm sure those extra arms are gonna come in handy. And here's Quark! He's fast and lucky!" A white-haired woman with six arms in an ornate headdress, some of her limbs gleaming metallically, comes out along with a ram-headed warrior-type.

"And Shatterstar, our handsome gladiator supreme!" A good-looking blond in white and red armor with a black star over one eye comes out, waving to his fans. They cheer wildly. A few ladies swoon.

In the stands, those non-natives to the Mojoverse wake up, strapped into their seats. There is a wide variety of beings, some from Earth, some from elsewhere. The Black Widow is among them, in a SHIELD-issue tank top and sweats with bare feet and tape around her hands. She was clearly training at the time she had that damned candy bar. There is also, notably, a tiny little pot-bellied African man with grey hair, seemingly serenely meditating in his captivity.

"Now for the compitetion! Here, Ladies and Gentlebeings, is the oh so delectable Teen Wonder. At 5'9 and 155lbs in his boxers, isn't he just cute enough to eat? I give you...ROOOBINNNN" Dangledooper shouts into her microphone as Robin is wheeled out onto the floor. 'Not this again....' the boy thinks.

Robin seems to have selected a rather odd outfit for this sporting event. Not that he was given much choice in the matter, but there you go. Due to Robin's meddling in the last games, he is wearing a magical collar, rather than a cybernetic one, along with a pair of white boxershorts, with little red hearts on them, and his 'Robin' mask. A bandage and an ice pack covers his left knee, and he has a sling on his right arm, along with a couple wraps of linen around his chest. Nothing appears to be wrong with him however, as he starts to pull the sling off.

"Holy naked sidekicks..." he mutters. "I was wearing more the last time." Tim blushes a little as he realizes thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of people are watching him.

It looks like Doug was also in training at the time of his Mojonapping. Not just because he's dressed much like Black Widow is, but because he looks an awful lot more exhausted than she does and is probably well on his way to sporting a shiner. He blinks once, looking down at himself, then at his surroundings... and he hangs his head with a groan. "Not again..."

A new player for your amusement tonight, straight from the hallowed grounds of a certain private facility. We're hoping for a big show from this one and, whether he survives or not, we think we'll get one because they call him Cannonball," Dangledooper whoops. "He looks like he's ready for action, too!"

Sam looks more furious than stunned by now. He's dressed in the clothes he'd wear to chase the little kids around the basketball court, same thing he was doing when one of them offered him a piece of chocolate. He doesn't remember a darn thing after that.

No sense fussing. Time to size up the situation and get going. He's hoping, on some level, that this is all some new training test for the X-Men.

Beast was in the middle of a workout when he decided to nibble on the 'Spiral Bar' he recieved. So at least he was wearing a tank top and shorts when he arrives. Though he certainly didn't expect to run into what he did. A bit paniced at the fact that he was out of costume with his prehensile tootsies revealed, Beast managed to break away afrom the guards and even make it down to the basketball court before he was recaptured. In that time though, he ran into a group of what appeared to be animal mascots... though the masks were a bit too real. It's a flurry of fists and feet before he's recaptured, though he does manage to knock the head off one of the animal mascots. A feline as a matter of fact. After a merciful beating, as death would often be kinder than making someone attend Mojo's games... Hank is thrown in his tube. Though he does slip the retrieved head over his human features, tucking his ponyatil up into it.

"And up next Doc... oh, but that would be telling. And that's no fun until sweeps! It's the bouncing bodacious Beast! Doesn't he look just scrumptious with that animal mascot head. Maybe Lord Mojo will be so kind and benevolent to fit him with something permanent... if they win of course." Hank growls angrily as he's released from his tube next to the others.

"Also playing for the rooooooooad team, hailing from a neighborhood unknown, the spectacular, the amazing, the other self-given titles of importance....Spider-Man!"

A bright light shines in Parker's face. He touches it, happy his mask is on, but as he looks lower he notices he's in a tight red and blue jersey with those John Stockton Short Shorts. Damn, dude. Damn. "What the hell..."

Natasha looks over at Doug and groans. "So you weren't making this crap up when I shook you down for missing roll call last night?" she asks. She frowns sharply and looks over at the viewing window, even as she begins to start testing her bonds.

Angela had gone down to the corner store to pick up some more odds and ends. That new chocolate bar looked intriguing, and would most likely go well with her afternoon tea. She purchased it, returned home to have her tea. The first nibble did her in.

Waking up in the tube was distressing, but when all that happens is the info-mmercial on How-To-Play Basketball, Phobia flickers away, and Angela just looks about in ever increasing worry and fright. She waits though, mind knowing only that things are about to get unfriendly and fast. Her green eyes flick about, hands coming up to press against the glass of the tube she's in.

"And just to make things interesting, we've tossed in a wild card. Black sheep of the family, and definitely used to playing for her own team, the nightmare inducing psychic herself: Phobia!!"

Dumped out onto the court, Angela prepares her mind for self-defense, and that inhuman guise of ichor green and black veins slides over the green summer dress she had been wearing. Phobia seems to hiss as her now glowing green eyes scan over the assembled 'team'.

Major Domo, Mojo's right hand man (of sorts) steps out wearing referee stripes and looking rather bored to death with having been saddled with this job for the basketball game. Minor Domo, his own right hand wo-man, is in a cheerleader outfit with a megaphone on the sidelines near Dangledooper. She's currently waving her pom poms wildly for Shatterstar. High above, on his hoversled, inside a reinforced bubble, sits Mojo himself, with a glut of hangers on. He looks like a giant cybernetic slug from one's worst nightmares. Or Jabba the Hutt mixed with a wiring accident. His yellow flesh ripples with laughter as he points a sharp finger at Robin. "That's what you get, little man, for meddling," he chortles.

The TV cameras swing back to Dangledooper again. "Major Domo will be serving as our referee, and he has the ball ready to go, setting it for its detonation sequence."

Major Domo puts a whistle in his mouth, and beckons Spiral and Sam to step up as centers for this jump ball.

"whdafu...." With a snort and sniff, Vander awakens to stare blearily through the window down to the court below. The announcer perkily prattles on through several introductions as Vander squints. It's unclear if he's quite got things into focus yet, though anyone near him might suspect that his MoJo-napping item came in a quart-sized brown paper bag.

"'fraid not," Doug replies to Natasha, a part of him distinctly grateful that she's here with him. He feels safer and less crazy already. "I'm not this crea... tive..." He trails off, blinking owlishly and turning towards the viewing window. He's hearing way too many names he knows. He's torn between feeling much better about their chances of escape, with Sam and Dr. McCoy on the court, and crippling fear of what will happen if they find him in the stands.

The Penguin reclines as much as his uncomfortable chair and seatbelt will allow him and a grin spreads from ear to ear, "I got 10-1 odds the Boy-Wonder eats it in the first half." He looks around at the spectators near him to see if anyone is taking bets. "Come on! Someone wants to see the boy win, right?" He notices Doug and beams, "Good showing the other night, I was rooting for ya to lose a limb but no hard feelings." He turns back to watch the game, "Let's GO SEXY LIMBS!!" This last is obviously aimed at the six armed beauty, Spiral.

Robin scowls up at the Jabba the Hutt reject and steps up to get into position to play. "If the last time I was here is any inidicator, this is going to get ugly really fast guys. Do not expect a fair game, and be prepared for all manner of deadly tricks. Try not to get hurt. Robin just so happend to line up across from Shatterstar, and the boy unwraps the bandages from his chest and knees, and ties them around the heavy ice pack. Not the best of weapons, but one improvises as best as possible.

Well, they really are going to play basketball. Sam wasn't just imagining that part of the prep time. Who plays basketball for a training test? Basketball in a cage with mutants like he's never seen before. But maybe that's actually Hank here with him, looks Hank-like. Sam's got to get over to him to ask what the heck is going on, soon.

But now he's being summonned to face off against a six-armed scary white blonde woman... Sam pulls up some power and his skin hums with it, he can feel the tingle in his feet and hands. He's not going to let her take the ball first and he's not going to get blown to pieces. He's the one who does the destruction, if not always on purpose.

Facing Spiral down, Sam's ready to go all the way up for the ball as soon as it's in the air.

Penguin notices Two-Face, "HARVEY! Fancy meeting you two here." He gives two curt nods, one to both sides of the 'face.'

The Black Widow glares over at the Penguin. "Is that nose as sharp as it looks? If so, beaky, how about working on using it to slice some belts, hm?" She curls her legs up, bending her knees until she can get one touching the side of her head as her hands have been belted in.

Beast moves into position along with the others, rolling his shoulders and cracking his neck. The feline head he's wearing seems to still be active or alive or something. As the ears perk and the nose wiggles. "Ok, I'm gonna carry a back-up mask with me from now on. Or something. This mask stinks." Beast wriggles his toes and waits for the whistle, glancing at the people they're matched up against. "Thanks for the heads up, Robin." Hank offers.

"No hard feelings," Doug absently replies to the Penguin, flashing him a quick, uneasy smile. He's distracted. Initially, it's the game itself, but it's hard not to get distracted by what Natasha is doing. At least it didn't entirely disengage his brain: "Hairpin or something?" he asks quietly, craning his neck.

Spider-Man shoulder slumps. It's honestly been one heck of a week, folks. First there was that gigantic monster thing. Then Cap paid him a visit and threw his shield at him. Well, let's not get carried away. . .He threw his shield to get his attention. Anyways, then there was the bit about Illyana and the demons. He reaches up to grasp the small ring near his neck, fastened upon a necklace. Not sure that'll do any help now. He sighs. He always wanted to be a Knick. Not sure this is what he fantasized about as a kid. Well maybe that announcer lady, but not this, man. Not this. "So we gonna call out positions or any of that sort of thing?" Pause. "Dibs on point guard,"he says quietly.

Phobia does NOT want to be center. No, thank you. Her eyes shift about again as she backs away. She knows no one here, and the thought of being cornered and alone speeds her heart beat. No, wait.. That red and blue spider mask. Little punk that interrupted what was proving to be a very good afternoon's mental jaunt withOUT the other red-eyed spider guy around. She thinks of him a moment, knowing he's goig to worry. And then the fact that he's not HERE, makes her grin. Oh boy! Play time.

Robin's voice... familiar. Phobia looks to him, eyes glancing over his lack of attire with a chuckle. ('Silly boy. You always manage to find yourself in various states of undress around me, don't you,') she thinks to herself. Well, if her last encounter with the Batboy was any indication of the young man's moxy, Phobia's more than willing to let him be her meatshield tonight. She steps to stand just behind him. Though, not without help. Her eyes shift to Shatterstar, mind seeking to worm into his, thoughts whispering: ~Tell me your fears. Are you scared? Good. But not nearly scared enough.~ The moment she finds a nightmare in him, that's all her mind will let him see. Whistle? What whistle?

"How about this?" Penguin raises his umbrella up to eye level and a thin blade appears from the tip. "Don't you all want to watch the mayhem?"

Shatterstar flashes Robin his sparkliest smile, before he flips over once effortlessly, for the enjoyment of the crowd, and settles into an athletic stance. As Phobia probes him she finds very little to prey on. This is all he knows, all he's ever known. It's pretty much Wednesday for him. Maybe even Friday since the competition looks much weaker than the norm for him.

Gog, Ma'gog's son, faces off against Beast. He growls and the longer Mohawk on top of his head rustles as he grins toothily at the doc. Ma'Gog faces off against Spider-Man, looking at his outfit in amusement. "You should be a point guard," he notes in a gruff voice. To guard from my point!" That's a sword he draws out. Urf.

and then there's Quark. Incredibly lucky, ram-headed Quark. He settles across the court from Phobia, looking docile, save the fact that he curls his grey-skinned hands into fists.

"And we're just waiting for a signal from Mojo himself to begin," Dangledooper announces. The cameras zoom in on the Spineless one and he runs a finger across his throat.

At that rather ominous signal, Major Domo blows the whistle and tosses the ball into the air between Cannonball and Spiral. It flips over and over, as Spiral leaps to reach with one arm, slamming two others at Sam's midsection in punches. It would be cheating if this wasn't the MojOlympics, surely.

"What. The. Hell." It looks like Vander's back in focus now after a few seconds of looking around at the motley crew in the stands and then back out at the arena. "Is. Going. ON." He grits his teeth on the last word as the whistle blows and yanks fast and hard at the bonds securing his wrists.

"Yes," Natasha replies to Doug. "With a razor edge on one side. If I can get the belt off, I can get to other things I keep on my person." She pauses from rubbing her knee against where her hair is pulled back for her workout and looks over at Penguin. "That would be ideal. I object rather highly to be restrained."

Robin lunges forward with a feint as soon as the whistle is blown and resets him self quickly, starting to circle Shatterstar, and see if he is dumb enough to follow Robin all the way around and put his back towards his team mates. The teen wraps one end of the linen bandage around his left hand and wrist, and holds the icepack in the left hand. A length of five feet or so of bandage connectes the ice pack his wrist.

For the moment, Robin is waiting, seeing what Shatterstar will do.

Penguin grins and winks, "As much as I would love to see you stay restrained, I'm a gentlebird and I'm a sucker when it comes to giving the ladies what they want." He extends his umbrella to Doug, "Do me a favor there, Sir, and help the lady while I watch this fellow Shatterstar kill someone. I will be needing that back."

Doug isn't sure why he doesn't find this more reassuring. Probably because of what the Penguin had just been saying to him a few moments ago. Still, he isn't inclined to look a gift bird in the beak, and he strains awkwardly against his bonds to try and reach the offered umbrella -- hopefully seizing it somewhere it isn't sharp. "Thank you. I'll get it right back to you," he promises, craning his neck to look past him at Vander. "Relax! We'll be out of here in no time. Right?" The last, he directs at the Widow, smiling hopefully.

Sam's skin is covered in an energy shield the second his feet leave the floor and the harder he's hit the more kinetic energy he absorbs to replace what he loses as he blasts off. He tips the ball away toward Hank.

"Keep it moving, try and make sure they have it when it blows." When his feet hit the floor, he throws a shoulder toward Spiral's midsection. Ma would be so disappointed in him for treating a lady that way.

Two-Face does his best to restrain the welling anger at being strapped to a chair. He turns his head from side to side taking in the oddness all around. "Sports with a chance of dismemberment?" He shakes violently struggling against the chair and its bonds. "Who put me in here?" Two-Face has lost his composure. "Let me out!" The on court violence catches his attention. "Kill 'em! Let me outta this chair...I'll kill 'em for you!

Natasha stretches her legs out to take the umbrella from Sam, and then flips it up with her feet, reversing it and catching it with her knees, so she can saw away at the belt around one of her wrists. "Agent," she refers to Doug, not wanting to name names in front of baddies, "How did you get out of here last time?"

"Just don't let them make baskets. We don't know what'll happen then." Hank backpedaals from Gog, gesturing for him to bring it. Hank grabs for the ball, and leaps over Gog's head.... landing in a crouch behind him and legsweeping him. Trying to get him off his feet. Hey... from what he can tell there's little in the way of rules. "Hey Cannonball. Gimme a lift to the basket when ya finish dancing." Hank takes off running, dribbling the ball as he's sure that rule is probably enforced... dodgeing, ducking, and weaving down the court. Trying his best to avoid the various traps, tentacles, and devious dangers.

Penguin seems to be afraid of the now raging Two-Face seated next to him. "Harvey, calm down. This nice lady over here is going to get us out of here." He glances back at Natasha, "So, when we get out of the bindings, what do ya say about catching a bite?" He chomps his pointy teeth as he finishs.

Spidey looks down to his wrists. "Web shooters, I love you." He takes a movement down the sideline trying to motion his hand upwards to Hank to pass him the ball. "Yo, dude! Assey-pae the all-bay!" Surely these monstrosities don't understand the mystical language known as Pig Latin.

Widow's words snap Doug's attention back to her, his face having gone a bit pale when Two-Face had made his presence so violently known. "Uh -- used a laser on the collars," he replies quickly, squinting in thought. "But I don't remember how we got home. I was helping Deadpool clear a path to the stands one minute, and the next, there was a flash..." He frowns and turns to the Penguin, raising his eyebrows. "You were here, right? Do you know how we got home?"

('He has no fear?') Phobia's eyes widen, watching Shatterstar flip away. Okay. Not good. Not good at all. Without fears to feed upon, there's little she can really do. Phobia needs to find a new target, and fast! She eyes Quark as the docile looking one lines up in front of her. The jagged tear that is her mouth droops down in what must be a terrible frown. One half step back is taken even as she spears into Quark's mind. ('Blows?') Phobia begins laughing. It's a cold, twisted, sinister sort of cackle, with little warmth or merriment in the sound. Eyes narrowing at her 'opponent' Phobia grins darkly and crafts her illusion in front of Quark's mind, for now testing his fears, listening to them, hoping what she suspects of her own trepidations of holding that ball too long are also felt by the opposing team. Because if so, here's her illusion: Hank has the ball, he's held it too long, it will explode soon. Just as it starts to go, the illusion of Hank in Quark's mind passes the ball, right at Quark.

Vander's response to Doug is half a snarl and one more jerk of his arms. He does settle down when he sees the umbrella being passed and wielded, though that may be because Two-Faced has the freak-out taken care off as much as it is the ineffectualness of yanking at the restraints (and because leaning as far away from Penguin as the belt will allow appears to have seemed to him like a good idea as well).

Shatterstar leaps at Robin, rolling in a ball to tumble past the Teen Wonder and try to push off the floor with his hands to plant both feet in Tim's back in a double kick, trying to shove him into Phobia.

Gog leaps after Cannonball, trying to chase down Sam with an angry roar. He's not as eloquent as his father. He launches at him, claws out.

Ma'Gog, swings his blade at Spider-Man in a dangerous arc as a distraction, while a tentacle pops out of the floor behind the webslinger to try and grab him. His Spidey Sense goes off a moment before.

With a movement that is very dancelike, Spiral waves her arms and disappears the moment before Sam's fist would have connected, to reappear above Beast, wrapping her legs and three arms around him, trying to slam the ball out of his hands with the other three.

Quark, being in the right place at the right time, as he usually is, is right where he needs to be to catch the ball when Spiral bats it away from Hank. Of course, he sees it coming his way anyway, like a deadly hot potato, via Phobia's illusion. He lobs it over his shoulder at the proper basket without even looking out of sheer panic. Swish! The crowd goes wild.

Dangledooper chimes, "And it's 2-0 in favor of Team Mojo. Hard for Quark not to score if he gets his hands on the ball, what with that unnatural luck of his. Terran ball! From behind their net"

The Widow grunts in response to Penguin as she continues to saw away at her restraint. If she can get one off, she can get through the others much quicker. "So our first order of business will be to get the restraints off everyone. After that, we'll see about getting out of these stands to help those people on the field," she notes to Doug.

Penguin scratches his chin as he thinks back to that night, "I can't remember." His free hand is making the universal 'pay me' sign.

The tumble roll kick. Robin has seen it before. Does it himself on occasion. The teen ducks and sidesteps the kick, and sweeps out with the weighted end of the bandage. His goal is to wrap Shatterstar's trailing foot, and pull him off balance long enough for Robin to turn and leap on his back. The teen is ignoring the 'basketball' game right now, thinking victory is probably best one in just eliminating his opponents.

Two-Face turns to view the Penguin. Obviously enraged. "They call this a game?" It's hard to tell if he's more angry about the basketball or the chair at this point.

Doug gestures helplessly at his workout attire, awkward with the restraints. "I don't have my wallet with me, man." And even if he did, he's still waiting on his first paycheck. He tries to focus on Widow to keep himself from getting too afraid around Two-Face, swallowing hard and nodding once. "Right. I know a couple of the people down there," he says lowly, with a slight grimace. He trusts her to remember what they covered in his interview.

The Widow listens to Doug, while keeping one eye on Two-Face. That one is going to be a problem. His restraints might not be coming off. With a final sharp SNAP! the restraint falls away. Natasha grabs the umbrella in her freed hand to slice the band off her other arm quickly.

Penguin turns back to Harvey, "I call this entertainment. Beautiful women, people we hate in danger," he indicates Robin, "and healthy dose of 'Who knows if we are going to live or not. Wah wah wah." Hearing Doug's completely unbelievable story about not having any money the Penguin harumphs, "I can tell you have a gym membership or something." He blinks twice quickly as the restraint snaps. "That was fast."

At the snap of the restraint, Vander leans a little forward. He's staying quiet, but he's looking around the stands to see if anyone else might be paying more attention to them than to the game.

There are several guards standing inbetween sections of the stands. They should be watching the spectators, but they seem more focused on the game at the moment.

Gog's claws slide harmlessly across Sam's skin and he sprints back to take the ball as soon as the points are scored. The short run across the floor gives him a chance to think about what he's seen. It's hard to take it all in at once, but he's pretty sure their team is nimble enough to get the ball into the net.

Wrapping the ball in energy to protect them in case it blows up, he tosses it toward the guy in the red and blue who was calling for it before. "Hey, Spiderguy. Heads-up!" If someone else has the ball, he can focus on getting them to the net and drawing attention to himself. Maybe that'll give Hank time to think of something instead of faceplanting with that crazy woman on top of him.

Penguin says, "See Harvey. You'll be free in no time. Trust me. You do trust me don't you?"

The Widow mumbles, "Don't do it Harvey, it's a trap." Just because.

Two-Face watches the game, no longer worried about being in the chair. A psycho fan has emerged "Go for the big guy!" If his arms were free he'd be pointing while shouting. "Not the little guy, hit the big guy!" Two-Face has obviously lost focus on the problem at hand.

"GRAH!! I hate clingy women!" Beast growls, trying to throw Spiral off him when she drops down on him like a spider. Hey Spider-Man, she's right up your alley. Of course, the ball gets knocked away and Hank ends up sprawled on the court when Spiral is done with him. "Dammit." He growls, regrouping with the others. "Ok, we can't overpower them. But we can out think them. Spidey, you need to use your webs on their eyes. Especially totem poll wench. Go team rocket." He figure Sam is their best bet to power through any of the defenses. But charges down the court to try to protect Spidey.

Penguin cheers as 'his girl' slams the furry beast-man, "That's it!"

"My wallet's in my locker." Which is true! Doug's locker just isn't in the sort of gym the Penguin probably thinks it is. As tempted as he is to owe him one... no. Doug wasn't born yesterday and he knows better. They'll find another way out. He flicks his gaze between the Widow's progress and the others in the stands, eyeing the guards for a long moment before taking a deep breath. They're distracted, they're okay.

"Whawhaweewha!" Spidey says as things start coming at him from all angles. "Gotta look out for those screens, ya know what I mean?" He fires webbing off across the court and pulls himself in a slide. He dips in and out and around some of the contestants, but manages to get himself away from immediate danger. "Float like a bee, stink like a butterfly." As Beast's directions come in, he shoots off a few webbings towards his foes eyes. But then, just then, he feels like John Starks getting an outlet pass at the 3 point line, like in that series against the Bulls. It's coming for him baby. It's his time to shine. But instead of letting the ball reach him, he fires a web toward it. As it fastens itself on the ball, he does a quick underhand movement, effectively lobbing it up near the rim. Those little Spidey-Legs in those short shorts give a powerful leap and he touches the ball just long enough to jam it home.

Phobia screams her indignation as Quark acts through the terror she induced. She too is ignoring the game in favor of focusing the full might of her illusions on Quark, seeking to hide his vision of the games with her dark gifts. And not just hide his vision of the games, but to shatter his mind and send his heartrate so skyhigh that the organ itself will give out under the strain. It keeps her rooted to the spot with a rattle-snake hiss drifting from her. ('Drop, damn you. Fall to your knees in abject terror!') her mind screams as she claws her illusions against Quark's mind.

Robin snares Shatterstar's foot and yanks, but it's not what he expected. The Mojoversian has hollow bones and he's incredibly light. The unexpected weight difference sends him flying far and overbalances Robin badly. His leap winds up turning into a tumble instead, with his opponent launched to the other side of the court. The blond gladiator lands on his feet like a cat.

Gog gets frustrated at trying to claw up Cannonball to no avail. So he charges at someone a bit more squishy, the guy in red and blue with the ball. R

Spidey's webbing manages to gum up the eyes of Quark and Ma'Gog, letting him get past them easily to dunk the ball. Quark, blinded and seeing only Phobia's illusions, drops to his knees, screaming.

Spiral begins another dance, and this time she fires eldritch bolts at Phobia to stop Quark's torment. This group clearly works as a team. They have to, or Mojo will have them made an example of. Some of them relish that as a means to end their servitude, but Spiral wants to LIVE, dammit!%R

"And it's a tie game at 2-2 folks!" Dangledooper announces. "What an amazing slam by Spider-Man! Now it's Team Mojo's ball, and Shatterstar is going to take it out it looks like!"

The handsome star dashes out, leaping and twisting amid the foes and his friends on the court. Tick Tick Tick ||BOOM!|| The ball detonates when he holds onto it too long. He is laid out on the court floor, singed looking, groaning. He's slow to get to his feet but does so when he gets a kick from Spiral.

"Ouch, that's going to leave a mark!" Dangledooper announces. "Time for another jump ball at center court!"

Natasha's second wrist is free, then the belt on her waist is slashed through. She glances over at the guards and then opens Penguins umbrella to prop it on one side of Doug's chair, hiding the fact she is free. She reaches behind her neck and pulls off skin. Well, it's fake skin, hiding a ceramic blade beneath the synthetic flesh. She starts cutting off Doug's restraints.

"Hey, dude." Leaning back to look at Doug from behind Penguin and Two-Face's chairs, Vander says just loud enough to be heard, "If these two wanna stay that's cool, but I'd just as soon leave if you and she are going." The BOOM echoes from the court - he glances down there, then looks back with an expression that's pretty much a plea. "Any time's fine."

Two-Face lets out a droning "Booooooo!" when Spidey scores. "Okay so maybe take the little guy more seriously. Come on."

"We'll get you," Doug replies to Vander, in the tone of a promise. ...well, a slightly anxious promise. Two-Face really does have him rattled. He's a good little agent and sits still while Widow works on his restraints, allowing himself a quiet sigh of relief once she's through the first one. "Thank you."

Robin hits the deck and rolls once, coming back up to his feet with a grunt. 'Well...that was unexpected.' Robin thinks as Shatterstar and he end up on opposite ends of the court. The teen in him can't help but cheer as Spider Man scores, and he does fist pump once. "Yeah, Spy-Deh!" he yells. Robin hangs back to play some defense, for a second, hoping to square off agianst shatterstar again with the ball goes boom and the jump ball is called.

This time Robin sets up near the center, and sets like he's going to go at shatterstar again. This time however, he charges as soon as the ball pops and tries to plant his shoulder into the lower body of whomever is jumping agianst Cannonball, distracting them enough for Sam to break clear.

In a matter of moments, Doug is free. Natasha hands him Penguin's umbrella. "Free Captain Monocle over there, I'll get the other guy." She drops to the floor and crawls over to work on cutting Vander's restraints with her blade, out of sight of the guards.

Doug takes the umbrella from Widow and nods crisply. He can do that. He closes the umbrella up and slides out of his seat, staying low as he scurries down the aisle so he can get to work on Penguin's restraints. "Told you I'd bring it back," he says lightly. His brow furrows slightly as he works. What is he smelling? Is that fish? ...whatever. Keep cutting.

Penguin looks indignantly at Vander, "That is low." Back at Doug, "Doug, I never meant to imply that I was trying to bust ya out, I'm a business man. I can't just go giving away every little bit of the details before someone greases a fin, ya know." He whistles as Widow low crawls by him, "I hate to see you leave, but I love to watch you go. WAH WAH WAH!"

Penguin says, "Don't judge me, Doug."

This game really doesn't look like it's going to end well and Sam isn't sure they can trust the fat dude even if they win. There's no way to protect everyone--especially from that spell-casting six-armed hellion. They need to have a go at getting out and get lucky. Really lucky.

Sam finds himself across from Quark. The weirdly lucky guy. Well, hell. It's not likely to hurt -that- bad if he fails. Blowing through things is what he does best. He hasn't died yet.

Sam blasts at Quark, breaking the sound barrier as he crosses the center line and reaching for the lucky little bastard with both hands. Hopefully he's faster than the little guy is lucky. There's no stopping, no turning, nothing after Quark but the cage at the other end of the court.

"Agent, you have permission to accidentally cut him a little," the Black Widow mutters as she gets Vander free and moves on to the little man with the potbelly who has been meditating silently since they woke up.

Maybe Vander's not as crude as he looks. To any casual observer, he's ignoring Penguin and suddenly finding an interest in the game - at least, he doesn't look down as Widow cuts through the restraints. "You know where we go to get out of here?" he mumbles, glancing up toward the ceiling and the rigging of the dome overhead.

"It's all right," Doug says up towards Penguin, smiling to himself at the Widow's comment. He does not, however, take her up on it. Once he's through the first restraint, he scoots to the Penguin's other side so he can get at the second one. "Guy's gotta make a living, right? I understand."

Penguin says, "I like you Doug. If you weren't already employed I would offer you a job. Since you do have a job I will extend you an offer, only once. Whatever they pay I can double it. We don't have benefits but DAMNIT DOUG, We HAVE FUN! WAH WAH WAH!"

Beast knows their biggest hurdle is Spiral, but it doesn't take a genius to notice she a 'Dancing Queen' right before she casts something. So when the plan goes into action, Hank darts and leaps forward.... actually leap at and on Spiral, wrapping his arms and legs around her body... hoping to pin her arms down. "Whatever you've got going on, better hurry up." After all, Gog and Magog are likely going to be coming for him. If Spiral puts up too much resistance, it's a beastial headbutt. Hopefully his Kitty Mask will protect him some.

Two-Face screams. "Some body... please...kill the little guy!" Has made up his mind by now that anyone against Robin is his team.

Penguin gets excited with Two-Face and in his excitement gets nicked by his own umbrella blade. He looks down at Doug quickly, "What in the world?"

Penguin mutters to Two-Face, "... you... and then... say?"

"Tempting," Doug replies cheerfully, giving a sharp tug to get the blade through the last bit of restraint. "But I think my boss might be kind of mad if I --" He cuts off, startled by Two-Face's screaming. Well. That isn't comforting at all.

Two-Face nods while cheering for his team.

Spidey sees Robin's move, and tries to assist in clearing the way for Sam by shooting wide webbing at the defenders between him and the lane. THWIP THWIP THWIP. He moves off towards the opposite side of the court, looking for the outlet if one becomes necessary. "Move the rock, move the rock!" he yells to his teammates. You know. Come to think of it, thinks Spidey. He should really just be trying to gum up the works of all the baddies. So he just starts firing webs at all the baddies like he's in an Al Pacino movie. THWIP THWIP THWIP!

Phobia screams and staggers backward as the eldritch blasts hit her full on. Her hands come up to try to cover her face from them, and the illusions dancing in front of Quark's eyes shatter like sugar-glass. A glance behind her, and Phobia barely avoids that landmine. Angered by the interruption, Phobia turns her mental claws to the six armed freak of a woman. She doesn't wait for the formality of whistles. There's little care for what mightmare she rips from Spiral. There's only the desire to shred the other woman's mind. Phobia just claws at her, hisses an inhuman sound from every child's nightmare of monsters in their closets and under their beds. But unlike with Quark, Phobia doesn't dump the full weight of her mind into her foe. No. That caused her to be open to attack. She keeps an eye on her surroundings as best she can, eyes seeming almost to smoke. It's that attention that lets her note Beast take Spiral to the ground and the other two seeking to help their teammate. With the part of her mind she had held in check, Phobia lashes out at the father/son gog-duo, looking to wrap their minds up in their nightmares. It's difficult to focus on crafted nightmares for each individual, and so Phobia just allows their own nightmares to take over fully, eyes sliding closed to lose herself in the joyous sensation of minds cowering in terror. Phobia licks her lips.

Spiral takes the jump again, and this time she gets a Teen Wonder in the stomach for her efforts. She's knocked off the line, onto her back, and she grabs at him with four arms to try and fling the boy away from her. But Beast piles on and her arms get pinned to the floor. She hisses up at them both. Gog and Ma'gog are agog, because a line like that cannot be passed up, as things go horribly horribly wrong for team Mojo. Then they are be-webbed and nightmare. They go down hard.

Sam launches into Quark, sweeping the ram-headed alien up and taking him along for the ride, right at the cage wall in front of the spectators currently working on an escape plan themselves. This could be painful for Sam, but he has seen Quark's luck, and he has hedged his bets. The pair strike the cage and blast through it, the cage shorting out entirely to keep from frying the luck-saddled Mojoversian. Sam burst through the cage, and through the clear steel window, reconnecting the spectators with their powers once more!

Only Shatterstar seems to still have it together, and he uses the momentary chaos to, hey! Where'd he go? Someone is tired of being enslaved. He's outta here, slicing through the now defunct cage and vanishing into the crowds of angry kidnapped spectators screaming for Mojo's blood. Mojo takes his leave just as quickly.

In the stands, the Black Widow slices the final restraint on the little man who was meditating. Gateway opens his eyes, stretches languidly, and gestures. In his hand appears a bullroarer. He spins it over his head so fast it makes a dopppler effect from the sound. A portal opens behind him, leading back to Earth, he smiles at Natasha and beckons for her and the others to go through with his free hand. Those down on the court have their eyes drawn to it, their mode of escape from CrazyTown.

"Well folks, it looks like the basketball game will end in a draw tonight, due to absolutely anarchy and carnage on the field! This is Dangledooper Transmada signing off for MojoTV. Tune in soon for our next MojOlympic event!" She rushes out, with Major Domo and Minor Domo close behind. The guards turn to try and fight Team Terra and the spectators.

Spiral takes the jump again, and this time she gets a Teen Wonder in the stomach for her efforts. She's knocked off the line, onto her back, and she grabs at him with four arms to try and fling the boy away from her. But Beast piles on and her arms get pinned to the floor. She hisses up at them both. Gog and Ma'gog are agog, because a line like that cannot be passed up, as things go horribly horribly wrong for team Mojo. Then they are be-webbed and nightmare. They go down hard.

Sam launches into Quark, sweeping the ram-headed alien up and taking him along for the ride, right at the cage wall in front of the spectators currently working on an escape plan themselves. This could be painful for Sam, but he has seen Quark's luck, and he has hedged his bets. The pair strike the cage and blast through it, the cage shorting out entirely to keep from frying the luck-saddled Mojoversian. Sam burst through the cage, and through the clear steel window, reconnecting the spectators with their powers once more!

Only Shatterstar seems to still have it together, and he uses the momentary chaos to, hey! Where'd he go? Someone is tired of being enslaved. He's outta here, slicing through the now defunct cage and vanishing into the crowds of angry kidnapped spectators screaming for Mojo's blood. Mojo takes his leave just as quickly.

In the stands, the Black Widow slices the final restraint on the little man who was meditating. Gateway opens his eyes, stretches languidly, and gestures. A portal opens behind him, leading back to Earth, he smiles at Natasha and beckons for her and the others to go through. Those down on the court have their eyes drawn to it, their mode of escape from CrazyTown.

"Well folks, it looks like the basketball game will end in a draw tonight, due to absolutely anarchy and carnage on the field! This is Dangledooper Transmada signing off for MojoTV. Tune in soon for our next MojOlympic event!" She rushes out, with Major Domo and Minor Domo close behind. The guards turn to try and fight Team Terra and the spectators.

Two-Face yells out. "No- The little guy in the blue and red. Hit him! Shoot him with a gun- do something painful!"

His restraints fully cut he rubs his wrists and smiles, "Doug you are a gentleman and a scholar. It's always nice to meet another, Wah wah wah! Now for you my enraged associate, have no fear I will have you free in moments." He nods as he takes his umbrella from Doug, "Thank you, sir." He quickly goes to work on Harvey's restraints.

Vander rubs at his now-freed right wrist, which is a little reddened from being yanked at the cuff. He--winks? No, it's a tic, and it fires three or four times before he gives his head a shake and seems to settle back in again. He looks - turns farther and looks - and the he's stepped up and over the back of his chair and is headed in the direction of the portal. "Yeah, that works," he says to Widow, apparently willing to give her the credit.

A portal. A portal! Damn. I guess that means I don't get to see Zatanna this time. Damnit Tim, get your head in the game! Robin makes a break for it and makes his way to the portal, getting the hell outta her, silly white boxers and all.

Doug's too alarmed by the incoming Cannonball to protest. After all, he did promise to give the umbrella back. "No problem." He shoots a quick look towards Widow before throwing up an arm to shield his face from the debris that results from Sam's crash landing, but as soon as the dust has settled and he's noticed the portal, he's ready to be gone. He hurries towards Widow, taking a quick look around on his way to make sure everyone that needs to be loose *is*. He wants to be gone gone gone before Sam sees him, but he's not leaving without her.

Penguin starts to sing as he cuts, "Closing time. You don't have to go home, but you /can't/stay/here!" Doing his best not to nick Two-Face as Doug did him. He makes quick work of the restraints and when he is free says, "Presto. Let's go home." He makes for the portal quickly, just before he gets to the portal he yells, "GUARDS THEY'RE ESCAPING!! A PORTAL! A PORTAL!!"

Two-Face focuses on the Penguin cutting him free. "Are we going? I thought there was more carnage in store."

When Doug hesitates, the Widow is grabbing his elbow and ushering both of them out past the doppler effect Gateway's bullroarer creates. She leaps through the portal with her trainee in tow.

Just before stepping through he says, "FIN FOR YOURSELVES!" A lingering "Wah wah wah wah wah!" Can be heard as he steps through.

Sam drops Quark before bouncing off the outer studio wall and redirecting himself toward the court again. That's when he sees the portal and the people fleeing. Sam heads back for the others to make sure they get out--he's good that way. It's only when he pauses to land that he catches sight of someone in the stands heading for the portal.

"Doug!" He can't be heard over the chaos, which is just as well because no one can hear him cursing after that. Still, he stays the course, as badly as he wants to catch Doug before he disappears again. He won't leave until the other four are gone ahead.

Two-Face doesn't think about it. He exits the way the Penguin went. Diving headfirst.

"Dude, don't you *ever* shut up?" Vander snaps at the back of Penguin's head as he follows him through the portal. "What an assh--" - the rest lost in the Doppler rush.

Beast plants a playful peck with his kitty mask on Spiral's lips before he leaps to his feet to run for the exit portal. "I had a awful time. Let's never do this again. And I think we should see other people." Beast leaps into the stands and heads for the exit portal. "Hopefully they serve roasted almonds on this flight." Beast leaps in, grabbing his ankles as he vanishes.

"Man," Spidey says as everything starts breaking up around him. "As much as I was totally the leading scorer, and as much as I totally want to destroy this team, I totally want to get out of these shorts sooner rather than later." THWIP THWIP! Two webs shoot off into the portal, catching hold somewhere unseen, and the Webhead valuts himself through the portal post haste.

Phobia could have stood there for hours, grinding her mind into her victims, but as Sam makes sure her attention is focused and that she notes the portal Phobia runs for it. This place, while fun, is not home. Afterall, she doesn't have her tea or her knitting, and there's that beautiful lace curtain filled with some spidey nightmares to finish up. As she runs, she rakes her crawls around any who get in her way, forcing them to jump or shove themselves to the side, and thus clearing a path for herself to the porta and hopefully home.

Well now, this is a very, very odd bunch of people to show up in various states of dress in the middle of the FAO Schwartz on 5th Avenue in New York City. Fortunately, it's way past closing time, so no children are mentally scarred forever by the ragtag bunch of escapes from the Mojoverse. And the landing is even soft, as they crash into a giant mountain of stuffed animals. There might be some panic as they all get buried in them, unable to see one another until they dig their way out, whether it's immediately, or they rummage around in hiding til certain authoritative types leave. Wink wink. Nudge nudge.

Mind you, the SHIELD agents will make sure to take the store security tapes with them as they leave, so as not to get in any DEEPER trouble than they already are.